by janice tsui
On a rainy October evening, a group of 12 or so bright-eyed Asian Canadians sat in a cozy space and talked about Asian stereotypes. We were aware that this was not necessarily everyone’s favourite way of spending a Thursday night, but it felt like important work. It ended up feeling much like group therapy, in a way that was different from talking to our family about gossip or food (although food traditions were mentioned in the discussions). In two-and- a-half hours, from the model minority myth to interracial and intra-racial divide, we touched on the everyday inner thoughts we had been so afraid to bring up with our friends
and family.
One of the discussions that stood out was the concept of a “F.O.B.” and how in many parts of the Greater Toronto Area it is possible to go about one’s day without speaking a word of English. One participant expressed their disdain at how FOBs (short for Fresh Off the Boat) don’t integrate with mainstream culture. We unraveled this by looking at how it is very difficult for those starting out in Canada to interact socially with their peers when they do not speak English, and how in Canada it is possible to speak one’s own language on a daily basis. This
is what makes our country free. Still, for many participants that evening and a lot of (Asian) Canadians it is difficult to reconcile this difference when so many Asian Canadians try to integrate into the community. It is a difficult topic that Asian Canadians contend with and it certainly brought a lot of fury into the discussion that night.
I felt personally connected to this as I consider myself quite white-washed while my sibling is what you would consider more “fobby”. It’s a difficult subject and I thought it was really well- handled while munching on Hong-kong style buns (the way to an Asian person’s heart is through the stomach! Or something).
In terms of solidarity, we concluded that Asians generally are discriminatory against other groups in the pan-Asian identity spectrum. Asian-Canadians are unsupportive of fellow Asians in a group of Canadians as well. Tokenism – the idea that there is usually one Asian in a group of Canadians – divides us and does not allow for role models.
Aside from critical discussions on Asian-Canadian culture, there were moments that brought us together as well. We all connected at discussing the straight-forward mannerisms of Asian-Canadians, agreeing that our culture is on a different system than Anglo-Saxon values altogether. This is why Western values are so foreign to our parents, and still to us.
I couldn’t help but feel as though I was in a room full of my new-found cousins. I felt safe, and grateful for this beautiful rainy evening. Even though laughing through issues would not make problems and personal strifes go away, they were supported. I realized that evening that peer support is essential to self-help, self-care and mental health, and I wanted to incorporate more of this into my life.
We ended the discussion by highlighting an Asian stereotype we are most proud of, and among extra-curriculars, high academic achievement, and filial piety, there were participants who confessed that their lives have been built upon conquering such stereotypes as being soft-spoken. It was an emotional closing exercise as we realized that we have more work to do in order to feel in touch with being Asian and Asian-Canadian.
and family.
One of the discussions that stood out was the concept of a “F.O.B.” and how in many parts of the Greater Toronto Area it is possible to go about one’s day without speaking a word of English. One participant expressed their disdain at how FOBs (short for Fresh Off the Boat) don’t integrate with mainstream culture. We unraveled this by looking at how it is very difficult for those starting out in Canada to interact socially with their peers when they do not speak English, and how in Canada it is possible to speak one’s own language on a daily basis. This
is what makes our country free. Still, for many participants that evening and a lot of (Asian) Canadians it is difficult to reconcile this difference when so many Asian Canadians try to integrate into the community. It is a difficult topic that Asian Canadians contend with and it certainly brought a lot of fury into the discussion that night.
I felt personally connected to this as I consider myself quite white-washed while my sibling is what you would consider more “fobby”. It’s a difficult subject and I thought it was really well- handled while munching on Hong-kong style buns (the way to an Asian person’s heart is through the stomach! Or something).
In terms of solidarity, we concluded that Asians generally are discriminatory against other groups in the pan-Asian identity spectrum. Asian-Canadians are unsupportive of fellow Asians in a group of Canadians as well. Tokenism – the idea that there is usually one Asian in a group of Canadians – divides us and does not allow for role models.
Aside from critical discussions on Asian-Canadian culture, there were moments that brought us together as well. We all connected at discussing the straight-forward mannerisms of Asian-Canadians, agreeing that our culture is on a different system than Anglo-Saxon values altogether. This is why Western values are so foreign to our parents, and still to us.
I couldn’t help but feel as though I was in a room full of my new-found cousins. I felt safe, and grateful for this beautiful rainy evening. Even though laughing through issues would not make problems and personal strifes go away, they were supported. I realized that evening that peer support is essential to self-help, self-care and mental health, and I wanted to incorporate more of this into my life.
We ended the discussion by highlighting an Asian stereotype we are most proud of, and among extra-curriculars, high academic achievement, and filial piety, there were participants who confessed that their lives have been built upon conquering such stereotypes as being soft-spoken. It was an emotional closing exercise as we realized that we have more work to do in order to feel in touch with being Asian and Asian-Canadian.